An ideal parent - Part 1
To bring up children with good values,
to raise them on the foundation of spiritual practice, parents
should first become ideal parents. Only then can they mould children
into ideal citizens for a secure and bright future. Some qualities
needed for becoming an ideal parent are illustrated below.
Parents, avoid making these mistakes!
Following are common mistakes made by
parents:
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Not
spending quality time with children |
Author Patrick Fontana writes about a millionaire in his book, “Some
small but important things in Life.” The millionaire’s
son said, “I have heard that my father is a very good man.
All of my father’s friends say so. But I have not experienced
it since I have never met him except sometimes at the dinner table.
My father has always been very busy with his business and club.” When
the millionaire realized how his son felt, he presented him with
a card on his 12th birthday. The card read, “My Dear son,
from today onwards I decide to devote one hour of my day, every
single day, with you. On Sundays I will spend two hours with you
doing exactly what you want. I promise that nothing and no one
will interfere with our together time.”
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Not
being a popular parent |
Patrick Fontana has clearly and concisely
defined a popular parent. He says that when young children are waiting
enthusiastically by
the door for their parent to arrive, one can conclude that the parent
is doing his or her duties very well.
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Comparing
the child with his siblings or other children |
When a child excitedly tells a parent about
winning third place in a competition, the parents must sincerely praise
and congratulate the child. Children feel happier when their parents
are involved in their happiness. A parent should acknowledge the child’s
success by giving him a small gift or prize. With this, the child will
feel motivated to do better in the next competition. The child should
not be compared with a neighbor’s child who has won first place.
The child can get disappointed and lose interest in the activity forever.
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Parents
who are always fighting |
Children are always confused when their parents
fight. Instead of having such fights, parents should resolve their
differences of opinions with wit, patience and understanding. By observing
this behavior children learn to compromise and resolve misunderstandings
calmly.
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Rushing
to a child’s help for the smallest things |
If a child has been asked to draw a house,
he should be allowed to explore his imagination and draw different
types of houses. At this point, one need not worry about wasting paper,
etc. If the child asks you to help, or if he becomes frustrated and
is about to stop drawing altogether, then the parent can help by drawing
a simple house for the child. Then, the child must be encouraged to
try one more time. If a child attempts at drawing a house, he must
be encouraged and prompted to draw further by asking questions, such
as ‘Where is the kitchen?’, ‘Who lives in this house?’,
etc. All children are imaginative by nature. A parent should nurture
the child’s natural abilities by providing the child with opportunities
and the means to develop his qualities.
In the next part we will discuss some qualities of an ideal parent.
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